


Mad As Rabbits

by Bixiayu



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, The Amazing Spider-Man (Movies - Webb)
Genre: Drunk confessions, Drunk!Peter, Drunken Kissing, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Light Angst, M/M, Peter is acting like he is five, Sleepy Kisses, wade is completely done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-22
Updated: 2017-01-22
Packaged: 2018-09-19 05:21:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9420413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bixiayu/pseuds/Bixiayu
Summary: "Should I take Peter drinking?" The Mercenary asked.Harry: "No, Wade."Gwen: "Wade, no."Wade: ...Wade: "Wade, yes."





	

**Author's Note:**

> My friends think I don't write enough happy stories.. so I gave it a shot.

_"Wade, No." Gwen said._

_"Bad idea," Harry agreed._

-

Everyone told him not to do it, not to take the first step in bringing Peter into adult hood.

By taking him drinking on this twenty first birthday.

But Wade didn't listen. Peter could handle himself he was a big boy. Even if Peter was slightly buzzed, he wouldn't be to much to handle, right?

_Wrong._

Peter's head was face planted onto the counter of the bar. A cup of alcohol tightly in his grasp. Wade had been searching for him, when he took his sight away from him for only two minutes, he wandered off.

All Wade remembered, was that he was out embarrassing him on the dance floor, showing off of his geeky dance moves he still remembered from high school.

It started off with one beer. Peter rejected and barely swallowed it without gagging.

"Wait..no Wade.." He complained. But a hand with an opened bottle of beer was still being pushed his way, towards his mouth. "This is disgusting.."

"Dude.." Wade complained.. "just drink it.. it's not going to hurt you.."

_'Not really.'_

Peter gave his small puppy dog eyes at Wade, begging him to stop. But the merc with a mouth didn't.

_But that was hours ago._

One tiny sip, turned into one beer bottle. And then one bottle turned into two.. and three.. and then four. And then the obviously buzzed Peter wanted to try new things. So the beer turned into vodka.

_And a lot of it too._

_Shot after shot after shot._

Then Peter wobbled onto the dance floor to dance goofily with Wade. Who was enjoying this much more than he should've. Watching Peter's face constantly light up with the numerous smiles and giggles. Having the younger male screaming at the top of his lungs, trying his best to sing to the songs that were blasting through the speakers.

Wade was laughing his ass off when he went to take a seat by the bar, pouring himself another drink.

_He was video taping the whole thing._

The web-slingers goofy dance moves included but not limited to, the sprinkler. He had one hand on the back of his head and one arm stretched forward. Arching his back with the beat of the music whole jerking his body awkwardly around. His arm accidentally made constant contact with strangers heads, which he would either have a huge and adorable laughing fits, or he would say sorry thousands of times before they got creeped out and left him alone.

But the one time that Wade took his eyes off of his baby boy, he was gone.

"Fuck.." Wade whispered. It was amusing watching him act all goofy when he could keep the twenty one year old kid in his sight. But who knew what trouble that he could get into by himself.

Wade scurried around the dance floor, pushing around the crowds of people to find Peter. He was scanning the club for what felt like hours ( _But was really just thirty minutes._ ) Until he finally made his way back to he bar and saw him.

His jacket was off, probably thrown on the ground somewhere far far away.. his forehead had small heads of sweat on it... and his hair had..

 _pieces of food in it_?

Wade took one step closer to Peter and regretted the choice. His nose burned and his eyes stung with the sharp smell of alcohol that zipped through.

He leaned in closer and shook his shoulder, trying his best to hold his breath.

"Pete..Wake up.." Wade whispered, he tried to be as gentle as possible. He didn't know what reaction he may or may not get.

"Pete.."

With one sudden motion, The web-slingers head shot up. Whipping back and forth confusedly. He was blinking hard while smacking his lips. He had a napkin stuck into the left his face, with droplets of alcohol stained onto it.

He didn't even notice Wade's presence as he saw the cup of vodka in his hands and already tried to bring it to his lips.

"Peter!"

The brunette turned his head and saw Wade staring at him with a sense of concern and an absence of humor.

A large goofy smile spread along Peters face. He let out a giddy laugh that sounded like it could come from a toddler. "H-Heeya..W-Wade.." He mumbled. He turned his attention away, trying to bring the shot glass to lips. But Wade pulled it away forcefully, accidentally having some of the clear liquid stain Peters shirt.

Peter's face turned into a maddive pout and his big brown doe eyes glanced upwards at Wade. "You..got me all wet.." he mumbled. "I'm all dirty now.."

His facial features shifted into a bright and perky smile again. "That's okay!" He smiled. "I can go into the nice bathrooms and change.."

"No.." Wade shook his head. "You can't do that.. how about we go home and change, huh?"

"Nooo!" Peter whined. Stretching his arms out to the full length, flailing them back and forth. "I wanna change in the big and p-pretty bathrooms! It's nicer than the once we have at h-home.."

"You can't do that, Pete.." Wade sighed, bring his hands to squeeze the bridge of his nose.

Peter let out an exaggerated gasp covering his mouth. Then he let out a gigantic laugh. "I can do anything!" He argued playfully. "I'm Spiderman!"

_'Christ Pete, no please no.'_

"DOES EVERYONE HEAR ME?" He yelled, " I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT! IM SPIDER-"

Wade slapped his hand onto Peters mouth, keeping him from revealing that he was the masked vigilante that roamed the streets at night.

"Okay, okay fine." Wade whispered. "We can go change into the pretty bathrooms if you follow me outside, alright?"

The web slingers cheeks were smushed together agastint Wade's hand. He nodded obediently.

The mercenary slowly pulled his hands away and nodded slowly, like he was trying to communicate with a three year old.

Peter turned the chair away and tried to take a step off the chair. But his legs buckled under him as he almost fell face forward onto the ground. Luckily, Wade's large arm pulled him close to his waist, keeping him upwards.

The younger boy started hyperventilating. "I-I'm slipping!" He squeaked. "I'm falling! I'm going to die! Please don't let me die!"

Wade rolled his eyes and slung Peter's rag doll body over his shoulder. "Just shh.. for a while, okay?"

"Right.." Peter moaned, letting his head fall. "I'll shh now.."

* * *

 

_Peter did not go "shhh"_

While Wade was carrying him home, Peter kept bombarding him with questions or random sounds that he could muster out."

"Moooooo..." Peter giggled.

"W-Why are d-doggies pink?"

"Oink oink oink piggies are pink.."

"Quack I'm a duck! Quack quack quack!"

"Y-y'know I take pictures of you when you sleep..."

"Peter-" Wade slightly snapped. "I thought you were going shh, remember?"

_'Sure he was cute, and I would have a huge laugh when Gwen And Harry see the videos of Peter the next day. But he's kind of annoying.. it's like dealing with an over grown child.'_

"What does shhh mean again?" He questioned. Making numerous doodles over the creases on Wade's leather jacket.

"It mean no talking, no noises.."

Peter hesitated.

"I don't wanna go shh!!" He screamed, he began squirming around in Wade's grasp.

_'This wasn't a good sign.'_

"But you have to..just shh for a while please?" Wade begged.

"No!!" The webs slinger complained. "Put me down!! This is kidnapping!"

"Pe-"

"Help!" Peter yelled. He was laying small punches along Wade's back, and swinging his legs to kick Wade's torso. He kept shaking his body, trying to slide out. "Im being k-kidnapped!"

Wade was lucky that there weren't many People out at this late hour. Any interaction with a drunk Spiderman and the police was bound not to end well. But there were still a few people who turned their attention towards the fussy child in Wade's arms.

"Okay okay fine just quit screaming okay?"

"Ya.." Peter trailed off.

Wade bent down to place Peter on his feet. The webslinger stood for only a couple seconds before he wobbled and fell right on his ass.

"Ow..." He wined. Turning to the side and curling his body up into a small ball. "I don't like this.. can you please kidnap me again.."

"Only if you promise to be quiet." Wade raised his eyebrows.

"Noooo... I gotta make the noises.."

The mercenary's eyes rolled. "Then I'm leaving you here.. goodbye Pete.." Wade turned his heels and pretended to walk away. He was hoping for Peter to fidget around and command him to come back, but instead he got the opposite.

_Peter started crying._

He buried his head into his knees and wrapped his hands around his body. "noooo..." he cried. "Please..pleaseee... don't leave me like they did.."

"Don't leave me like my parents did..please.."

_'Fucking shit fuck'_

Wade came racing back to Peters side. "Wait don't cry okay?"

But Peter's sobs only got heavier and louder into his knees. Rattling his body, causing him to shake on the sidewalk.

He stroked Peters back. "Hey I'm right here alright? I'm not going anywhere.."

Peter's wet face glanced up at Wade's. Even in his drunken state, Wilson would still see the small boy that still felt abandoned by his parents deep inside of his eyes. "P-Promise?"

"Yes.." Wade breathed. "I promise... let's just go home okay?"

"Please just take me home.. please."

* * *

 

Once Wade and Peter entered their home. The drunken brunette was placed gently in his bed. He curled up under the blankets into a fetus position. The mercenary went to their closet to change into something more comfortable. He wasnt in the mood for trying to change Peter. But when he was halfway changed, he heard a weak voice behind him.

"Wade..." it moaned.

"Wadeeeee..."

"...Waaaaaade.."

"Wadddddddde.."

The mercenary tried his best to hold his tongue. Peter was a happy drunk, but he was fragile. And that last thing he wanted was another fit of tears.

"Yes, Pete?"

He popped only the tip of his head from the blankets. Revealing his scraggly hair, puppy dog eyes, and a nose. "Hi." He giggled. "The bed is super...cold.. can you pleeeeeease come join me?"

Wade sighed and surrendered. There was no point in fighting.

As soon as he placed his body under the sheets, Peter's body was glued onto his like a overgrown koala. "You smell so so good.." Peter moaned.

"Okay... that's nice Pete..just sleep now please..?"

That smaller male pouted, but nodded his head sadly. "O-Okay.."

Just five minutes later. Wade felt several sloppy suctions being dragged across his skin.

"What the ?!" He said, turning towards Peter.

He saw the brunettes curly hair millimeters away from his face. Moist pink lips tracing each inch of Wade's bare skin, but not in a sexy way. Peter could barely keep his head up as it was bobbing with each second that passed. Each kiss, felt like octopus suctions when they came from the male that started invading Wade's personal space.

Wade chuckled nervously while trying his best to gently remove Peter's face off of him.

The webslinger looked up at him, his eyes joyous and desperate at the same time. "K-Kiss me just one last time..please..pleaseee." He begged

Wade rolled his eyes and agreed.

He cupped his hands around Peter's head and pulled him closer. Laying soft kisses over his lips. Wade was taking it slow, but it was the exact opposite for Peter. His lips were moving at a much faster rate, engulfing Wade's lips and his chin.

_They stayed like that for a while._

Before Peter passed out lazily sprawled on Wade's chest. His face buried deeply into the mercenarys neck.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it!


End file.
